Growing Old

"Live with enthusiasm. Nobody grows old by deserting their ideals. Years wrinkle the skin but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul. You're as young as your faith as old as your doubt. As young as your self-confidence as old as your fear. As young as your hope as old as your despair." - General Douglas McArthur

Have you ever received one of those things people intend as a compliment and it comes out all funny. Well this weekend was my prime for them. From 2oish-year-old guy: "You couldn't be 27 - you look really good for your age!" And of course, the "Andrea I would have never guessed how old you are!" :) Maybe that was why when my friend Matt (19) came up to me at the dance and said, "Andrea how do you survive these YSA conferences" I could smile so aptly and say - "A really great sense of humor!"

Its only about a month until my 28th birthday and to some that might mean I'm growing old. But taking the advice of Mary Ellen Edmunds I've just decided to grow . . . wise, kind or even better adorable.

Ok, ok so that might be a stretch but I feel like now more than ever I am settling in to who I am, or who I really want to be. I express more of what I think more readily, and have more confidence in listening and risking then I used to. Do I have things figured out? No way, but I am more confident that most other people don't either. That helps me relax a little more.

There's a woman in my parent's ward that inspires me to grow old- she's interesting and graceful and intelligent and incredibly kind. I think there is something beautiful about that kind of growing old. And I'd like to imitate it. My grandmother was one of those kinds of women. I didn't really know her well, but I remember little things about her that I loved, like how rosy her cheeks were, the way she wrote faithful letters to my mom because that was the easiest way for her to communicate, and the way that she was so quick give me those strong grandma pats (wacks really) and tell me how grown up and beautiful I was. Yes I can can be old. I'm ready to be more like that.